figs and debranding

Today someone at work asked me what I did over the weekend. Usually, I can answer this question without pause for good reason. I spend almost 50 working hours a week dreaming about the weekend and all the things I will do. When given the opportunity to talk about it, I will. But today, I found myself saying aloud, 'hmmmm...what did I do this weekend?' I mumbled something about reading a lot, which I did. Then complained about the summery weather, which it was. It was only hours later (hours spent primarily dreaming about next weekend and all the things I will do) that it hit me. 'Oh yeah! I debranded the kitchen cupboards.' See proof.

Exhibit A

This project is in the running for my most pointless endeavor (not counting certain aspects of my job). I know this because at the end of it all I justified the task by saying to Jon, 'well, at least I honed my manual dexterity.' For me, that is the last line of defense. Pleading manual dexterity. Last week I had been staring into the cupboards at my previously debranded vinegar and oil bottles and it hit me that I could debrand everything. On Friday, I half-heartedly began the project. It involved removing labels that were never meant to be removed from anything I could get my hands on. In no time, I became compulsively driven to finish the project. This took much longer than expected. It involved a lot of Goo-Gone and razor blades and gummy residue from bottles being painstaking removed before depositing itself elsewhere. Namely, on a nice skirt I was too lazy to change out of and everywhere in the apartment via the bottoms of my shoes.

Jon was very supportive. He complemented the end result at some blurry point on Saturday afternoon that I can hardly recall. I was delirious from Goo-Gone and taste-testing unmarked spices. Paprika vs. cayenne. Easily solved. Cloves vs. nutmeg vs. allspice. I'll be damned. I guess I take those three for granted. I almost had to call Mara to bail me out with her bloodhound reflexes and culinary aptitude. But I did not want to admit to her that I had no idea which bottle was coriander. This could possibly have ended our friendship. I finally figured it out by process of elimination and the Law of Conservation of Mass.
i.e. I could have sworn there was coriander here somewhere

sound advice:
If you ever get the urge to debrand your kitchen cupboards, just shut them. I, on the other hand, plan to never close mine.